The pot calling the kettle, period.

"Oh were it to stop, my tick tock tick tock clock, were it to stop- beep beep beep, sleep sleep sleep..."

The set up:
bare feet, filthy on the bottom from watering the garden and pacing the porch during a difficult phone call
salt clinging to the curve of my chin under my bottom lip from summer heat
the brain is restless, the stomach empty and wondering how to fill itself up

The simple joy of picnics. Piece by piece food that you liked when you were a kid: fruit and veggies, cheese and crackers, with the adult addition of aphrodesiastic wine. People on blankets. M.anifest in the background. Straight laced Minneapolitans dancing to hip hop. Soooooooooooo many bicycles. Another night of window shopping pretty boys and running into people you know from something. A silly, ironic film in the background. The film is good, but everyone's there for the people and the picnic.

I'm getting restless and red eyed. A week at home, though I plan on spending a lot of it cheering up my sad mother and wearing a synthetic fiber bridesmaid's dress, is much needed. Even just a week of air conditioning will be welcome. A week of not looking at the oven for 12 hours a day. Today in the kitchen, reaching for the salt, AA snarfled in my ear like a dog. Ironically, it made me excited to see my father. It also made my ear tickle.

I may have bit off more than I can chew trying to arrange dates with more than one person at a time. I'm a cook. I shouldn't be dating in the first place. I need to start writing stuff down. This new one, I don't know. He's laid back almost to the point where I have to wonder if he really wants to be go out. When we're in the same place, he's smiley and blushes and seems rather happy with the situation, but when we're not, he is downright reticent.

I'm trying to play a game where I simply do not know the rules. The last time, we played without rules and we both got hurt a little- I got my heart broken and have had to give him up entirely because I don't like these new rules- the rule of inactive fractional love, diminished friendship and too little to late. It's now beyond late. It's like when you sit in traffic trying to get somewhere so long you realize its pointless to still try and go, and you should just turn around. He's left me a wide berth to turn around in.

Did I mention someone stole my license plates? Very suspicious. I have to wonder what they're being used for. All of my criminal defenses are up because I'm watching the second season of Dexter on Korean YouTube. God bless YouKu.